We were so happy for her that we almost jumped up and down on the marital bed; eight long weeks of pledging, and she had reached her goal and survived.

The next day she called at noon. “Okay, I’m going to a birthday party now, I am freaking out with happiness, but this has been the most nerve-wracking experience in my whole life.” I said, “So the rest of college should be a breeze now, right?” and she said, it will.

Here is something that boggles my mind: Alexandra and I each had a goal, a dream, for the last few months. She wanted to receive her bid, pledge, survive hell week, and get into the sorority she had chosen last summer. My dream was to publish a book before I die. I was working on my sixth manuscript, a Young Adult paranormal novel titled Immortal Link. I felt in my gut that this would be the one that would make it. The writing, proof reading, rewriting, editing, waiting, changing things, querying agents, finally deciding to self-publish, creating the cover (with my daughter’s hand reaching for the indestructible, ghostly handprint of Alexander Campbell in cell #17 of the Old Jail in Jim Thorpe, PA), all these things consumed me since March of last year.

On Saturday, a friend helped me finish the cover on her laptop at our monthly writers’ group meeting, and I submitted the pdf files for the text and cover to CreateSpace which is connected to Amazon.com. The format got accepted a few hours later and I ordered my proof early Sunday morning.

Alexandra and I reached our goals on the very same day…

Is the nest half full or half empty when they come home on the weekends?

We just survived our daughter's first year of college. Everything that I imagined could happen happened. Wrong roommates, partying, home sickness, a friend's alcohol poisoning, average grades, and 2AM texts to get her out of there. But it was good too in a way. She learned to manage and grew emotionally. The second semester went much smoother and she had good grades. She pledged to the sorority of her choice and called us at one in the morning when she got her bid.
For you parents out there who don't know what you're getting into in a couple of months, or for you who know and would like to compare war stories, I created this blog titled: A child's first year of college from the parents' point of view: Is the nest half full or half empty if they come home on the weekends?
Why do I use parent in singular form even though her father lives under the same roof? Because it is different for the men who, as in our case, snore away obliviously on the couch while the mother gets texts and horror emails from her only child away in college. The father gets clued in when the drama is over and the kid has moved on.
I will give you detailed updates at least once or twice a week about the previous year (I saved all our emails). Since I already know that it has a happy ending, I can give you the gory details without worrying you too much.
For privacy, I have changed all names.
Now come along for the ride...

Pledging has started

I got a text message from her on Monday, February 28, 2011: I withdrew from my pre-calc class to protect my gpa cuz I don’t have the time to give it the right amount of study time…I’m in class so don’t call me.

I called her later and she explained that she talked to her advisor about dropping pre-calc until next semester. I was concerned about her credits, she needs 12 to be considered full-time and stay on campus, but she still has 13. She said she is too busy right now (pledging) and doesn’t have the time to give enough time to study for math. All her other subjects are good, she has good grades, and she wants to protect her grade point average. I am not thrilled, but other mothers said that sometimes a kid has to drop a course and just take it in the summer or next semester.

Tue, 1 Mar 2011: Alexandra,

Just make sure you don’t drop any other classes, you need 12 credits to live on campus and be included on our dental insurance plan. I trust that you made the right decision. How was the sleep-over? Mom

of course i made the right decision im not a simpleton
and the sleepover was good

(woo, boy) I hope she’s right (You might also notice the scarcity of her emails, in text and frequency, compared to the first semester. I take it as a step in the right direction, becoming more independent and comfortable on campus).

Thursday, 3 Mar 2011: I’m coming home this weekend, consider yourself lucky

Meeting her new roommate

Monday, January 17, 2011: The second semester is underway. Alexandra is back on campus since yesterday and the house feels empty and sad. We got used to having her home again for one month, and she was great. She actually spent time with us. We watched movies together, she hung out with us, not just her high school friends, and she was really nice and helpful around the house. Since the time she was a teenager, this is the first time that I feel like I’m having my “little girl” back. Let’s hope the new semester is less dramatic. Here we go…

Hey Alex,

how was your first day and night?

What did you discuss at the floor meeting? How are your other floor mates?

Please try to find as many used books and maybe art supplies as you can. Maybe you meet kids who had some of your courses last semester and you can get it cheap from them? Also announce your books and the recorder for sale or trade or whatever.

How is Frannie? Does she snore? Is she bossy? Did you figure out where to put the TV?

How loud is it at night, did you get any sleep?

Just tell me what your general feeling is about your new roommate. If she asks you if it bothers you when she brings in her girlfriend overnight, don't say ‘it's okay’ right away, tell her you don't know yet and will have to see how that works out.

What are you all doing today? I am home, so call or write anytime. Love, Mom

heyyy
last night was good i really like my new suitemates...Fran didnt sleep here last night idk where she was and shes still not here but she was here for a while last night and she seems nice so i have a pretty good feeling about this room. i had lunch with Meghann and now im going with Tina and Josy to target just to get notebooks and folders and they have some art supplies there for cheap so yay! my floor meeting got cancelled till today so ill let you know =]

I was just outside walking Max and then we played soccer in the snow and he looked like a snow puppy. He keeps lying by your bedroom door, waiting for you. I told him you're back in school and that's life, but I do take time to play with him in the snow and walk him across the fields.

I'm sooo glad to get a good report from you, I pray all the time that you will have the best college experience possible. Dorming, pledging, sorority, frat parties to some degree, not too wild I hope, getting good grades, meeting a bunch of new people, problem solving, all this will be part of your life experience and the person you become. Make the best of it, because when you look back many years later, it might very well have been the best time of your life.

Did you figure out on which side to hook up the TV?

I just created my account on CreateSpace, the self-publishing print-on-demand site through Amazon, now I need to wait for my manuscript to come back from the editor I hired in Wisconsin, make the corrections, format it, and change it into a pdf file. Kathy will help me with the cover on Adobe Photoshop.

ttyl, Mom

i put the tv on my desk for now
we went to target but couldnt find any art supplies but i got folders and note books, and some soup lol
i need magazines for my art class so save them please ill get them this weekend
i miss max soo much!
anyways im going to dinner soon and then watch greek so ttyl!