Saturday, July 23, 2011

Tally of first semester

So now she’s home for a month, having completed her first semester. I had beautiful auburn hair before she left for college, now it is streaked with gray. Alexandra couldn’t wait to get home on Friday, the next day she complained that she’d rather be at school than home. I can relate to that, because whenever I go home to visit my family, it takes me three days to adjust. She was in a miserable mood all weekend, thank goodness she had to work long hours and wasn’t around much. I guess the internal struggle between being a cared-for-child and an independent adult is in full swing.
From the day Alexandra was born, I raised her bilingual. I created flashcards as seen in the Better Baby program and “studied” with her every day. I implemented the Montessori Method at home. We traveled. We visited museums and Science Centers, parks and playgrounds, especially in New York City. She was surrounded by a variety of religions, cultures and age groups. I breast-fed her for several months, I ate right, I read to her every day until her teenage years. She was a Girl Scout from beginning to end, having achieved the Bronze, Silver, and Gold Award, and two religious awards. She trained with the toughest coach in Irish Dancing for eight years and competed in front of hundreds of people. She has both parents living under the same roof. We taught her to save and budget, to write thank you letters, and to cover your mouth when you yawn. She was raised in the church and celebrated her communion and confirmation. I pray with her every night.
She should be a genius, but she is an average student. She is rather selfish with that entitlement feeling that swept through their generation. Her compassion skills are underdeveloped.
Her GPA for the first semester is good enough to pledge for her chosen sorority, but not much above it. She worked 53 hours in the mall in 2 weeks and earned her spending money for the next semester, so she can study and pledge without having to work on her days off during the coming semester.
PS: Mom got an A- in Algebra

Your new roommate is a what!?

Please do not call out tomorrow. It’s too last minute and you better get a stronger work ethic going or you can kiss your internet phone good bye.
That’s not to piss you off, it’s to help you in the future. You can’t have everything handed to you all the time, you work when you’re scheduled, you get that phone. Always remember, I love you. I have to be tough sometimes. Love always, Mom

okay so i moved my printer, my tv, my laundry basket full of miscellaneous stuff in it, a bag full of the little things on my desk, and my kitchen things like plate, bowl, cup and utensils all into my new room =] they all seem really nice and fun so it should be good, except my new roommate is a lesbian..... should be interesting
and i packed all my stuff except my bedding so hopefully u remember to bring the big box it came in to move out, we can pick up the rolly bins we used on move in day at X Hall
okay see you tomorrow

Dear Math, after today's final, I am officially done with you forever. Sorry to hurt your feelings... but damn, am I excited.

Al, You should receive your battery charger this afternoon via UPS (forgot it at home after the weekend). Let me know when it arrives. Also let me know asap if you can move some of your stuff into the new room. Good luck on your finals, mine is tonight. Mom

good luck, i have part 1 tomorrow...prob gonna fail it even though i studied all day yesterday and all day today like legit but all i can do is my best because he is the worst teacher ever i sat in that class for 3 months and didnt learn a damn thing oh well hopefully my pre calc professor wont be a hundred years old and wont do things the old fashioned way and when the tutor tells me how to do it the new and improved easy way that i actually understand, my professor wont mark it wrong. i didnt get my cable yet im in the computer lab, i just fb messaged my new roommate asking if it would be a problem to move my stuff in though it shouldn’t be
okay im gonna go eat lunch and then study some more

It’s scheduled to arrive around 3pm. Wish me luck for tonight. I’m actually psyched for my math final. Mom

Wednesday, Dec 15: Text: How did it go? Mom

It was okay but part 2 on Friday is gonna be so hard

Thursday, December 16, 2010: Sweetie, Oma will light a blessed candle for you all day tomorrow, like she did for me. I really felt the power of it go through me during the test, it kept me strong and clear headed, and I was able to do all the problems.
Concentrate on the power of the blessed candle burning for you overseas and let it go through you. Hey, you can even ask the prof if something is unclear, kids in my class went to her desk constantly. Try to study as much as you can today, even go to the tutor if you can, or better yet, could you ask the professor for help? And please do not go out partying tonight, it will not be good. Be strong and do your best, I just hope you studied math along the way, not try to cram it all in now. You can’t cram for math, it all builds up and you need to stay on top of it from the beginning.
Let me know if you’re moving stuff into your new room. Good luck, Mom

Email from mom's friend to me, Heather:
Are you kidding? No one (except maybe the Asians) in this generation put as much into studying as you do!  No kids have that work ethnic anymore about anything.  I'm sure you did great. 

Fair of hair and blue of eye

Tue, 7 Dec 2010: How was your night? We finally put Tiger(cat, nocturnal) in the garage with a pile of pillows and blankets, so we could get some sleep. The night before he jumped into our bed five times and I went to work feeling like a zombie.
I forwarded you instructions on how to change roommates for next semester. You only have tomorrow to do this. Go to Z Hall during the day, ask for a single room or find a fit. Someone who doesn’t have friends over non-stop. Someone considerate. Mom

last night was good, Anya passed out at like 11:15 so i finished the movie we were all watching and went to sleep too.

Alex, Dad is trying to get in contact with his Army buddy, Van Zeeland. He responded on his facebook, but the guy is hardly ever on. Dad looked at Van Zeeland’s pictures last night, his whole family is posted. He has a cute son, one year older than you, goes to U of M. Why don’t you contact him and say your fathers were friends in Germany, haha. Include a picture of yourself, maybe you can hook up, wouldn’t that be a hoot. Hey, he’s fair of hair and blue of eye… Mom

umm never say hoot ever again unless ur impersonating an owl
ill look him up on facebook, but in M? and does that mean he has light hair and blue eyes? Alexandra

Yes, it means blond and blue eyed, according to Tituba. I’m reading the Salem Witch trials again. Mom

Text on Wednesday, Dec. 8: Got a new room. Still in same dorm, but 5th floor. Alexandra

Good. With whom?

Frannie X, she seems nice, I found her on fb and my friend moved to the same floor so yay
okay so my new room is 514 and so i have to move everything out on the 19th and move everything into 514 on january 18th sooooo yeah
nd im done with some classes so i can return the books so do u wanna do that on friday when you pick me up because you paid with your debit card
so anyways thats the new news

Dark and Quiet

Wednesday, Dec. 1st, 2010: Happy first of December! Open your first window in the calendar. Before you’re even done with the calendar, you’ll be home for a month. Mom

i know i opened it and it was good. not as good as the european chocolates but still good
i got a letter from aunt liese yesterday

Later Alex sent me a huge email about the problems she is having with her roommate and her friends. I will not disclose it here, but it had to do with not getting enough sleep or privacy.

We tried to solve it several ways:
Ask Alyssa what days she leaves at what time, maybe you can coordinate with her to drive home and back in the morning for one day a week, to get your sleep. Especially during finals. You need to sleep and study, I might even run up and get you one afternoon, if you have a ride back the next morning. This won’t last forever, it’s definitely a learning and adjustment period.
Bring an eye-mask like I wear to make the room dark, and I have earplugs for you. Mom

i mean i sleep in meghann’s room on tuesdays usually and i try not to be in the room a lot but i mean idk she is considerate sometimes its not like all the time so idk but yeah im looking for a new room next semester.

Good idea. You need your sleep. I would even consider paying more for a single unless you find a great match to room with. Here are two good quotes to remember to keep things in perspective:
You can’t learn to sail on a smooth sea, and
This will be better by the time you’re twice married

i dont think they have single rooms and i dont mind having roomates im just not friends with mine and i feel like everybody else is...

Thu, 2 Dec 2010: Do you know where to go about changing roommates? When do you need to start the process?
I thought of something that might help for now. Bring one of these eye masks with you, and we’ll get you a CD player, calming music and headphones, this way you’ll have it dark and can tune out the noise, it will work wonders. Remember I used to relax like that on the couch and was oblivious to the world. And it’s easy to fall asleep while listening to calm music and ocean sounds.
Also, find a quiet place on campus, probably the library, where you can go for a snooze and quiet and regroup, even just for a half hour or hour.
You have to lay down the law with your roommates without getting into a fight if possible, and if they are mad, so what, you’re mad too. Tell them calmly you have earlier classes and need to get through finals, you need your sleep.
We’ll talk more when you’re home tomorrow. Mom


Heather, how are you and Alexandra today? Maureen

I've sent her some advice, like headphones with calming music to fall asleep even if others are in her room, and an eye mask. We'll see.
We will have a nice long talk with her when she's home. Roy made the mistake of asking how she's doing last night, so I told him. He said: "Take her out then," so he's no help. I will buy her a CD player with calming music and an eye mask for darkness. I know she can be very bitchy and tries hard not to get too mad. I printed out the housing rules and she's definitely right. She can switch roommates after the first week of the next semester. For now we'll let her sleep as much as she wants when she's home. Heather

More trouble and some solutions

Dec. 1, 2010: When I checked my phone this morning before leaving for work I had these text messages: Text at 1:52AM: I’m losing my mind I can’t dorm here anymore sorry for wasting ur money. And don’t call me back cuz my battery is dying so I won’t answer. An hour later: disregard my messages.
My stomach sunk immediately and I drove to work cursing and praying. My whole day was completely ruined. If she drops out of college, she’ll have no future and live with us forever. As soon as I got to work, I talked to three of my co-workers, all of whom told me this would happen, it’s to be expected, and normal. They told me to ignore it, let her work it out, not bail her out, she’s smart and knows that if she drops out she can’t get a good job, and that she probably just needed to vent. So not only am I worried now that she’d lost her job at the mall because she missed her shift, but now I freak over her not getting a college education. Why is this so hard?

(Email to Mom from friend) Meet me at my house by about 6:10 does that sound good for you?  Maureen

Sounds good, have to vent. Al is driving me crazy. Very dramatic, hates  dorming right now, I'm ready to rip her head off. Ladies at work tell me it's normal and all part of teenage girl behavior, especially first year of college. It sucks!

See you tonight you can vent on the ride to diner.  Maureen

(Later) Okay, what is going on? Mom

Nothing really i was just stressed, kinda hate my roommates is all

Advice from the booklet “Empowering Parents of First Year College Students” by Royard Mullendore and Leslie Banahan:
 Parents should listen closely to determine if their student is calling to ask for help or to vent frustration. Often, students simply want and need to tell their story, and they turn without hesitation to parents for sympathy and encouragement. There is no denying that receiving a call or e-mail from an unhappy child is troubling and upsetting for parents. Every part of the parents’ being is telling them to get in the car or hop a plane, train, or bus to get to campus to save their baby. Usually, the student’s bad moment passes, and he/she feels much better after dumping all the woe on Mom or Dad. The student goes on to the next part of life, while parents are left with all the emotion and worry. Especially with the speed of today’s communication technology, students don’t spend much time processing information or an experience before calling home, so parents often hear a very emotional and unexamined version of what their student is experiencing at school. Many first year students have a meltdown moment when college life just seems too hard, too confusing, and too overwhelming. But a) this is a common experience among first year students, b) the moment of helplessness and hopelessness usually passes fairly quickly, and c) today’s college students usually choose to call their parents when they emotionally hit rock bottom. This call may come earlier in the term but typically occurs during the crunch period between mid-term and final exams.

Sunday, July 17, 2011

Missed her shift at the job...

Thanksgiving break, then back to normal. (She worked at the mall on Black Friday at 4AM to 8AM, on Saturday night from 6:30PM to 11PM, then didn’t know she was also scheduled for Sunday afternoon until we went to the store and the manager told her she missed her shift)

Mon, 29 Nov 2010: Al, Please be careful with what you do on Facebook, in case the job is watching. I really mean it. Don’t say anything like oh shit, guess what I missed my shift, and then rant on. Have you heard anything? Mom


(She got to keep her job, but it was only seasonal anyway)


 Wednesday, November 17, 2010: so did dad say anything about the tattoo...even Maggie’s parents said yes and shes really excited about it.

I didn’t talk to him yet, because it can wait until the weekend. You’re 18 and there’s not much he can say. Since I’m paying for your hair, please pay for the (small!) tattoo yourself. I do not want to give you a tattoo as a Christmas present, especially since I don’t like the idea. Please think carefully about this step, you will have to live with this decision for the rest of your life. It only looks good on smooth skin, so imagine a tattoo on an eighty-year-old…Mom

ugh fine i guess everyones getting cheap christmas presents then

(Mom didn’t answer back)

okay so we decided to get it over winter break

Monday, 22 November, 2010: see ya in 2 days! lol so pointless.... but im about to go to class anyways
xo Alexandra

Hey sweetheart, there's a man in your bed

Tue, 16 Nov 2010: Al,
I just got the very last, and I mean squeezed in, hair appt. for you. Tess is making an exception and will squeeze you in on Wednesday, the 24th (day before Thanksgiving) at 5pm, so I will get you the latest by 3pm or so. I could also come before that, will have to take a half day. When will you be out of class, even if you have to leave a class in the middle of it, as long as you get your assignments before you leave. But that is mighty nice of her, we have to be totally on time.
She was all booked, but when Tess heard the appointment is for you, she told the receptionist to pencil you in at 5. Next time we have to book much earlier. Mom

okay so i have math and history cancelled, im not going to my music class cuz its from 430-715 at night and hes ethiopian and they dont have thanksgiving so he probably wont let us take off but ill just tell him that i have a far drive that night, im sure he will understand. im going to english just to see if anything is due if i stay the whole time its from 12:20- 1:10 and if no one is there ill just leave so ill be ready between 12:30 - 1:10 and ill pack before english so whenever you feel like coming here

Sounds like a plan. Don’t tell the music teacher that you have a far drive, b/c if he asks you where you live, you’re caught in a lie. Just say you have plans with your family. He might cancel class, he lives in this country and knows the customs, so just wait and see what he says tomorrow about next week. But tell him you won’t be there because of holiday travel plans. You won’t fail his class if you miss one day, right?


Okay, I'll pick you up right after work. Mom
When I got there, there was a young man in her bed, fully dressed, taking a nap. He was a friend, and gay, so it's okay, she said. We ended up having a nice conversation then drove home into a long weekend. Yay!! 

Greyhound Foundation and Puppies Behind Bars

Mon, 15 Nov 2010: Al,
I just filled out the form where we give donations to the causes in the catalogue, to have money come out of our paychecks every two weeks.
This is what I picked:
National Greyhound Foundation:
Retired Racing Greyhounds live in cages, die in desperation. Thousands are killed each year. We rescue and find them homes. Your gift saves their lives. 
Puppies Behind Bars:
BHB trains prison inmates to raise puppies to be service dogs for the disabled and explosive detection canines for law enforcement. 
Sounds good, right? So we’re giving something back. Peace, Mom

A haunted house in our own family

Thursday Nov 11, 2010: OMG, you won’t believe this, I’m not sure what and how much to believe:
Your cousin lives alone now in the house in Pennsylvania. Nobody is paying on the house so now it’s in foreclosure, a real mess. Anyway, that’s not what I mean.
He says there is a ghost in the house! He hears noises all the time, the TV goes off and on, and the other night, the remote control flew around the room. Then he says he had his wallet upstairs and it flew down by itself, attacking him! He got so scared that he drove to his mother’s place and refuses to go back. Do you think he’s on drugs or is this for real? It’s not an old house, you remember it, down the hill, we just drove past it on the way to Jim Thorpe with Dad.
I would like to talk to him in person. Maybe he’ll come on Thanksgiving. But your aunt just called last night telling us this. What a weird family.
The one thing worth striving for is the unattainable because, in doing so, the journey never ends. (Jerry W. Santer)
Good, huh?
Does that mean I’ll never publish a book? Mom

lmao well pent up anger or remorse is said to create such strong energy that it can do things like make small objects fly around the room. i remember reading this story about a family that moved into a new home and things like vase flew off tables and smashed into the wall. their teenage son went to boarding school for a while and the strange occurrences stopped and when he came back it started again so they brought in a specialist and she said it was happening from the stress that the son was having from moving away from his friends and he was angry plus hormones created this intense amount of energy so maybe there is an energy in that house from his parents’ fighting and stuff or maybe there is a presence there that doesnt like him or maybe the energy is from him or maybe he is on drugs...who knows but hes a good kid so i dont think he is doing drugs
just came back from tutoring
sooo helpful!
what time r u coming to get me tomorrow?

Hopefully by 3:30 the latest, have to be home around 5.
Glad you are benefitting from tutoring. My tutor told me last night I wasn’t ready for the next Aleks test, but I insisted, and only got a 75, oh well. I can live with it. Mom

PETA and I want to change the world

Wednesday, November 10, 2010: i was doing some research on marine bio and i was researching stuff about animals and i stumbled upon this page by PETA and it was all about the cruelty of circus elephants and how they trained them and omg it was so sad!!!!! like they had facts about elephants in the wild and they said that researches who studied elephants say they can express sorrow, anger, and fear just like humans can and they have greeting ceremonies for when an elephant that has been gone for a long time returns back to the group. and that a baby elephant that has lost its mother has nightmares and wakes up screaming!!! and then it has pictures of how elephants get trained for the circus and omg its horrible!!like they shock them and beat them if they dont do the tricks right and most of them are babies so they can learn the tricks at a young age. its so sad i wanna support so idk theres a petition that i might sign that says i wont go to a circus that has animals cuz they abuse them. idk ill show you the website this weekend.

I can believe that it makes you upset. It’s easier to not know about stuff that’s going on in the world, but on the other hand, we need to know about it so we can make a difference.
You will learn soon enough that you cannot change the world, you can only change your own actions and thinking, and do as much good to others as you can. (no matter how much we love animals, we cannot ignore people).
We just got a new catalogue at work, about donating a small amount from our paychecks every month to a good cause, if PETA is in it, maybe we chose that, but I would also like to support “Puppies Behind Bars” again. I’ll let you look through it when you’re home.
Listen, is that party at X University this weekend? If so and you sleep over, don’t forget about that mandatory meeting at your job on Sunday morning, you will have to be able to go there early, that comes before all else. I am sure you know all this, just a gentle reminder, okay. If you want to make a difference, you need not only a good heart and a steel will, money is needed for everything and always, so having and keeping a job, showing responsibility, all that is what counts so much.
Anyway, I see you are always learning, expanding your horizon, that is all good, even though some of it will hurt when you see what people are capable of doing. Greed is the root of most evil in this world. If you can be strong enough to not let greed affect you (like Jochen [my brother-in-law, mayor of my hometown in Germany]) you will be the best role model and the best candidate for making the world a better place.
Wow, now good morning, love, how are you? Mom

Answer: i wanna buy a shirt from them (PETA)

Tutors and a student's secret helper

sorry for some reason msn wouldnt let me respond to emails today until just now so thats why i didnt respond earlier
today was chill and chilly! it was so cold, i was so happy i had my black north face with me
it was sleeting and in my math class, i looked out the window and it was flurrying!
yeah so i'm gonna check my schedule tomorrow so hopefully they posted it, idk when they post the schedules on the computer for B&BW so i'll check tomorrow and every day until i see it posted
tomorrow i have my speech class and after that i have a group project and we are all meeting at the library so thats where I will probably be for a while
i signed up for tutoring today for my math test on friday and then i have a meeting with my GEM on thursday so i have a pretty busy week
anyways can't wait till thanksgiving idk why i just like thanksgiving and christmas eve lol
so anyways good night and u'll probably get this in the morning so good morning! lol
and yes i take my emergen-Cs lol

I am glad you’re using a tutor, I just had one of our scientists here at work explain a math problem to me, too. Now it makes total sense. Maybe you can get together with others from your math class.
What is a GEM?
Try to find time to exercise, it will make you feel better. Make it a habit, like I do with walking. There is always a half hour in the day, if not, you need to set priorities. Nap and walk, the rest will get done somehow, hihi.
We are proud of you, it looks like you’re doing all the right things. Did you change the time on your alarm clock?
Remember to send a silent blessing towards anyone you have a problem with, it will dissolve negativity over time.
Love, Mom

i know i need to go to the gym, but i am eating healthier :)
yeah it ice rained here too
a GEM is my General Education Mentor, he helps out in my transition to university class and makes sure you are doin okay and its mandatory to have a meeting so thats why i am going
i woke up so early today because everyone is sick so we all go to bed at like 11 so im up like 2 hrs before class
im feeling better tho i think those emergen-c things work
see ya soon

Glad to hear you’re feeling better, tell the others about that stuff, supposedly it’s a college students’ secret helper. $10 a box, but worth it if you don’t miss classes, fail, and have to pay again for the same class.
I have to pick you up as soon as you’re out of class on Friday, b/c I’m going to Judy’s house for another buying-stuff party. Judy always bought from me/you, so it’s the least I can do. Maybe you can pack the night before.
Drink these fizzies, love you lots,

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Just a simple cold, for crying out loud!

Friday 5 Nov 2010: Good morning,
I love you. How are you feeling? I’ll pick you up tomorrow at four. Let me know what the nurse says. Mom

good morning
I'm feeling better so I didn't go to the nurse
my throat doesnt hurt anymore just my nose is still runny but other than that i feel a lot better
xo Alexandra

Was it strep last time you went to your doctor?
If you still have a sore throat or if it comes back next week, definitely have it checked, because it can affect the heart or something, don’t mess with strep. But I’m glad you feel better, sweetheart.
See you tomorrow, Mom

Mon, 8 Nov 2010: Good morning,
What did you do last night, after I dropped you off? Who was already there?
Take your fizzie. Mom

COLDEEZE to the rescue!

Wed, 3 Nov 2010: Hey Alex,
Sorry to hear about your cold.
Find out if there is a nurse’s station or doctor available on campus who can prescribe antibiotics if needed. Hopefully it’s not strep throat. Your insurance card should be with all your important cards like your driver’s license.
Tell me as soon as you find out more,
Feel better,

Judy, Alex is sick with a cold and sore throat, I just hope there is a doctor on campus in case she needs antibiotics (she is prone to strep throat). How can I take her to the doctor at home if she’s only here on the weekends? Heather

From Judy: Yes, OF COURSE, there is a Health Center on campus, and they would get her whatever attention she needed if she went there........but if you want her to go to a Dr. here - it's really the same as if she were home...she only has 4 or 5 classes at most, with LOTS of free time during the day (and nights).......if she were home, you would probably had to have taken off from work to bring her - the same with her at school - she's only an hour or so away.
But a cold s a cold is a cold........she can always get a strep test there, and if it's negative, a cold will go away on its own more likely than's just annoying while its here!  But I'm a FIRM believer in COLDEEZE at the FIRST SIGN of a cold – My husband’s sister pooh-poohs it (being a Dr.), but I've felt "saved" from those zinc lozenges on more than one occasion! Judy :-)

my nose is still runny but my throat doesnt hurt as bad so hopefully its not strep
i dont have time to go to the nurse today because me and my friends are working on our history midterm exam paper today in the library and that needs to get done by friday.
i only have 1 class on thursday so ill go then, Alex

Permission from publisher of 'Fight Club'

Tue, 2 Nov 2010: I got permission!
Your request to reprint 92 words from FIGHT CLUB by Chuck Palahniuk in your forthcoming self-published paperback edition, What Would Molly Maguire Do? (later changed to Immortal Link) to be published in Spring 2011 is such that we are pleased to grant permission free of charge. This permission is limited to the paperback edition, English language throughout the world, excluding the UK. For permission in the UK, please apply to Donadio & Olson Inc.
Now I just need to inform them about the title change. Mom

oh cool!
I'm sick…Alexandra

Saturday, July 9, 2011

Thu, 28 Oct 2010: Alexandra,
Imagine picking up a book from the shelf and reading the back to see what it is about. What would appeal to you more? Thanks, Mom 
What would Molly Maguire do…
is a question Catholine asks herself every day since that fateful afternoon. How can she be tough like her fierce ancestor? Why did she have to be such a chicken? True, she swore an oath with her older brothers to keep her mouth shut, so the family could stay together. But when Cathi realizes that her brothers can cope even less with the aftermath than she, the victim, it is time for revenge. All goes according to plan until the spirits in cell# 17 recognize the descendant of their worst enemy. Cathi is forced to save her attacker’s life in order to protect the innocence of twenty wrongly accused men. 
Three siblings swear an oath to never tell what happened on that fateful afternoon. But fear is a prison without bars, and the secret they hide to keep the family together is destroying their lives. When fifteen-year-old Catholine Kennan realizes that her brothers can cope even less with the aftermath than she, the victim, she decides to end the nightmare by getting even with her attacker. All goes according to plan until the spirits in cell #17 recognize the descendant of their worst enemy.

Her answer: The second one

Halloween warning

I know this week is party week b/c of Halloween, please be smart about it. Don’t get arrested for being drunk or if drugs are going around. Stay clear of all this b/c it would ruin your future. In case something does go wrong, if you ever do get arrested, always ask for a lawyer, don’t answer any questions w/o a lawyer present, no matter how guilty you might be. The outcome of charges will be much better if represented by a professional. Never waive your rights for a lawyer. I am reading a really good book about it, written by a juvenile defense attorney, it makes so much sense, even though you’re of legal age. (When Kids Get Arrested - What Every Adult Should Know, by Sandra Simkins, RU Press)
But please try to be smart about your actions and decisions; we can’t help you if you do something illegal. It’s not cool to be in jail, no matter what they say. Don’t ruin your future, Mother

Scare package

Tue, 19 Oct 2010
Guess what, I’m having midterms next Tuesday, unbelievable. At my age.
What classes are you going to take?
I ordered you a Scare-package (college care package) yesterday, could take anywhere between 5 to 10 days, but it’s on the way. Later, Mom

Mon, 25 Oct 2010: Al, let me know about all the stuff that’s in the scare package. Did it say scare package anywhere? Just curious, b/c I ordered it b/c the name is so cool. There should be a few Halloween gadgets in there, too.
Enjoy, don’t forget to share with your friends, Love, Mom

the box had a jack o lantern on it
it had a lot of candy and im good on that for a while
a happy halloween black and orange beach ball
halloween characters
a card that im assuming u wrote that had a spooky halloween land scape
if bath and body works doesnt call by tomorrow ill call them
send me the picture that u want for your cover of the book, i found a cool website that i can play with and make it look cool and write on it and stuff so send me the edited one and ill play with it some more
thanks again for the scare package

German-Irish-American is going Greek

Tuesday, October 12, 2010 11:13 PM Subject: the low down: 
sooo i just got done with my interviews (for sorority), i looked soo good! i figured out how to curl my hair with the curling iron and it looks awesome! now i need hairspray so i can do it more often. im in my room with my friend Tracey who also rushed with me, we just made hot pockets, i havent eaten since 2 o clock so... im pretty hungry and then we're gonna go eat outside and wait for our phone calls cuz i dont get service in my room. so thats all for now :)

At one AM we received a call from her: I got my bid!!! I am so happy right now!

Awesome, Al, I am very happy for you, because that is what you wanted, right? I was relieved to get your phone call, I had my cell phone on my nightstand to hear when your text comes in, but then you called. Did Tracey get a bid, too? I wish I could have seen you with your curled hair. We have more hairspray at home for you to bring to campus.
What did they ask during the interview, were you nervous, how long did it take?
Are you sending blessings and positive thoughts to your suitemates? Remember, the positive energy will flow back to you and make good changes in your attitude and the way you treat each other, preparing you how to deal with all kinds of situations in life and the working world.
Now tell me more about last night. I hope you still have time to exercise, go to the tutor, counselor, important stuff like that, use your time wisely and ask for help, it’s all there to help you succeed in college. I truly wish you a most wonderful college experience. Later, Mom (very tired)

so yeah last night was crazy
me and Tracey go there like mad early and so we went to the bathroom and some of the sisters were in there and we were like talking nd stuff and so we werent really nervous anymore
so then we all had to wait outside while the sisters were setting up and then they broke us into groups and sent us to different groups of sisters, each sister had a question to ask us and when that was done we rotated to other tables of sisters. we did this like 6 times and then we got out at like 10:45 and then Tracey went to her dorm to change and then came to my dorm to eat hot pockets since we were starving. then we sat outside and waited for the phone call and then it got really cold so we went to the library since thats open till 2 am and we waited till like 12:45 and then we both got the call and Tina called me and was like well i just wanted to let you know that it was a really tough choice since there were so many girls and it was really hard so i was oh i didnt get one and she was like i just wanted to let u know THAT YOU GOT A BID! i was like jumping up and down in the middle of the library nd ppl were like wtf? and Tracey got one too so yay! :D

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Paranormal happenings

Okay Alexandra, for the picture in the jail, can you please prep your hands with black nail polish, maybe a little raggedy, like Catholine’s hand would look like, and wear the Claddagh ring and maybe another one that would fit the theme?
Something paranormal happened in our house last night. Dad brought home flowers and chocolate for our 20th anniversary and before we went to the seafood restaurant, I put the chocolates on a shelf in the pantry. Totally sure of it. When we came back they were gone, the whole bag was missing. We all searched. This morning I found a few pieces on the pantry floor and the bag on the table, I know, maybe Dad found them, but the weird thing was that they were gone from the shelf while we were out of the house…
So we’re doing the Bruce Tango event tomorrow night, then Jim Thorpe, PA on Sunday. In between those two days I have my writers’ group meeting, and guess what the guest speaker ( a published paranormal author) will talk about: the dangers of researching paranormal stuff for your novel… I mean that’s just freaky. I think the chocolate incident was an advanced warning.
Are you spooked yet? Love,  Mom

ummm.... was it the dog?
oh yeah! Happy Anniversary lol totally forgot lol
i took an online mental health screening for the school counseling center and it told me I have symptoms indicating bipolar disorder....hahahahahahaha i knew i was nuts

Most mental health screenings come out whacked, but do you think you need help? You can ask for free counseling, you know. Mom

no i dont think i need help

Jim Thorpe, PA

Thu, 7 Oct 2010: If we go to Jim Thorpe as planned on Sunday, we can go on a regular tour, the ghost tours are only on Saturdays, would you be home on the 16th?
I emailed Betty Lou (the Old Jail Museum’s owner, setting of my YA paranormal novel) and asked her what day she would be there b/c I want to meet her, so let’s wait and see what she says. I also asked if she would grant me artist rights and allow me and you to go into cell #17 to take a picture of the handprint for the cover page. I hope. I would like your hand to pretend to reach up to Mr. Campbell’s handprint and take a picture of it, wouldn’t that be cool?
I took off on Monday since you’re home.
Boots from Journey's look great, not bright colors, more subdued on a black background. Mom


Thu, 7 Oct 2010  Hey Al, Look who has special permission to take a picture of the handprint and whose hand will be on the cover, wow. Are you free on the 16th? Mom the author

 lol i like jim thorpe i wanna just chill there. so excited for ghost hunting lol
yeahh ill be home cuz homecoming isnt till the 23 so...
okay i have to go jump on the bus and get to history
then i have music fundamentals from 430 to 715!!! ajfsjdfoaf kill me i hate that class 

Trouble Part II

I talked to her at length, read from the college book (Been There, Should've Done That: 995 Tips for Making the Most of College) about roommate issues, talked to friends who said she has to work through that, it’s a learning experience, she is learning more outside the classroom than inside. Throwing four strangers together into one suite is almost guaranteed to be a problem, she’ll learn from it, get tougher, learn how to deal with people she doesn’t like which will happen wherever she goes, always, all her life. I sent her another email saying: 
Alexandra, embrace the people you have a problem with. Don’t change yourself to suit them, send out good wishes and blessings every time you see them, and offer your problems up to God. He will take care of them.
This is a lesson for life, wherever you go, you will encounter people you will not get along with. Luckily, you can change that negativity by sending out positive thoughts. It might take a while, but it will never fail. I believe in you, Love, mother

(advice from my co-worker: You will get calls/e-mails full of drama, pick me up, I hate it here, you worry, can’t sleep, she moves on, you still fret, try to solve the situation, she’s already moved on and is happy now, for the time being, brace yourself for such times, and it is happening right now).

no i mean im happy right now cuz im at starbucks with my friends...i just went to art building, i really like it in there and all the creativity...maybe ill minor in art? Alex


First sign of trouble

Date: Wed, 6 Oct 2010Note from me: husband and I were at a nice restaurant on Wednesday night celebrating our 20th wedding anniversary when I received a text from Alexandra: "I just sent you an e-mail, please don’t open it, I just needed to vent. .." Well, my evening was ruined, I called her, she was at the gym, everything is fine now, so I emailed her if she could just give me a hint of what that was about. I did not open the e-mail until she was home for the weekend and we could talk about it. This is what I sent her:

okay,I did not open your email, but please call me on the cell or email me if everything is okay. Is it b/c of music, or greek or roommate, just don't tell me you're dropping out of school.
Can you please give me any info so I don't have to worry, which right now I do.

She mentioned she wants to "change the room."

Why change the room? You mean different decorating?
2)      What was your issue last night? Is it survivable?.
Please answer , Mom

didn’t you get my email?1. change room as in get new roomates....?  i wanna change rooms, i like school i just hate Kate and i dont wanna fight her and then get kicked out so, i need to find out how to change roomates and if i still can....
2. issue- i hate Kate, i cant take her, shes fake and bugs me to no end and i just dont wanna live with her or Anya anymore even though i like Anya but she just likes to get drunk
3. no i dont think i need help

Okay, this is the email she warned me not to open until she’s home:
From: Alexandra  
To: Mom  
Sent: Wednesday, October 06, 2010 6:58 PM
Subject: just need to vent.....
heyyy i dont want u to be alarmed by this message, u know how i have to cry ever year and then afterwards it turns out to be the best year ever......well its that time of year again but im not really crying i kinda just need to vent cuz i feel kinda stuck, maybe its just cuz this week is so hectic... and dont worry i know i told u my class ends at 715 but he let us out early so yes i did go to class
i feel like i dont wanna dorm anymore but then again i feel like i do....maybe i just need to change roomates? idk cuz i do like my roomates a lot but for some reason i dont feel connected to them, dont get me wrong we all hang out and stuff but idk i just feel like Anya and Kate are really close and Christine has her own really close friends so she goes and hangs out with them and i mean yea i have my friends but no one really close yet that i can like just hang out with whenever or go to dinner with so yes i do go with Kate and Anya and Heather and Kelly but idk i feel like they are all really close idk i guess im just used to our town where i spent my whole life with the same people so i didnt really have to make new friends im just stuck with the same ones the year before and eventually new people just came into my life.... like i never really had to make an effort, but dont get me wrong i still am my social self and i do talk to people but i guess i havent had found that person that i can call my best friend yet, you know? but thats why i wanna join this sorority and i have lots of fun with them but now the mixers are over and its just 45 minute meetings and if i get a bid i cant do anything till next semester so I am gonna feel stuck till next semester but like i feel like i need to dorm cuz thats when i know whats going on like i feel like if i commuted i would miss out...
idk i think all this emotion is coming out cuz i am pmsing...i guess im still not used to college yet, like i have fun and i have my friends but idk!!! idk im stuckkkkkk


Best Starbucks on campus

October 5, 2010:
hahah i feel like such a college student im sitting in the new Starbucks on campus drinking a small coffee working on my laptop and writing this 7 page paper

Awesome, just like a writer would do…Mom

this starbucks is awesome!!!! its not like a dinky stand that just sells some coffee. It has cozy lighting, soft jazz music in the background, comfy benches with outlets in the walls for people to plug their laptops and phones in and like every Starbucks drink and food that a regular one would have. i love it in here cuz its so cozy and comfy in here and its so grey and cold and windy outside.
oh and can u bring my boots with u cuz i think i want to wear them to the ghost hunting thing so i dont get my uggs messed up if its rainy or dirty in an old house...u never know....

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Emergen-C, a student's best friend

October 4, 2010: Hey Alexandra,
A co-worker told me about a product to keep you healthy from flu and mono, it’s a powder package that you pour into a glass with water and it fizzes. 1,000mg Vitamin C, it’s a Health and Energy Booster, made with different flavors, a fizzy drink mix. Would you drink it if I get it for you? The product is called “Emergen-C” and supposedly a college student's best friend, cool huh? Later, Mom

oh yeah i heard about it. and can u get me apple cider vinegar?

Sure. AC vinegar is very healthy, what’dyer plan to do with it? Just curious. Mom

u put 2 teaspoons in a 16 oz water bottle (size of a regular water bottle) and sip it throughout the day its supposed to detox you and keep u full so u lose weight, just want to try it, see if it works

Is it working for your roommate? Mom

Anya isnt using that one, shes doing something different and then we're gonna see which works better

Burnt: The Cookbook

Great, I’ll consider it. It’s better than Dad’s suggestion for another book of mine: Burnt, the cookbook
What did you do last night?  Love, Mom

nothing really made hot chocolate, read my book and then changed my dry erase calendar to october and then went to bed lol

A mother's intuition

Fri, 1 Oct 2010: i went to the mixer last night but im wide awake now bright and early for my 9:30 class

Hey, we’re on to meet Bruce Tango next Friday, Oct. 8th, at 7:15 for the ghost event. Don’t make plans for that day, okay. Mom

yay!!!!! a perfect way to end a stressful friday
next friday i have a math test, a speech and a paper due...woo!

Where was the party last night and what was the theme? I’ll be up there about 9 o’clock tonight.

well its raining really hard so it might be cancelled but idk so ill let u know but u dont have to run here after work
party was at x, the frat was really nice the theme was corporate ceos so they wore like business suits and skirts and stuff i wore that blouse from forever 21
it was fun but then our driver got lost in downtown x for like an hour till the sober sister downloaded a gps on her phone and got us back lol anyway have to eat then on to history

Lost in downtown x is like a suicide trip, very dangerous and scary. Not good. Damn it, Al, that’s why I woke up last night and started praying. You would never survive your freshman year without my prayers…Mom

lol yes i would! we were in the nice part of x and we didnt stop to ask for directions cuz we didnt wanna die lol but it was funny a car full of innocent girls in x, its comical =]
so the game is still on so ill see u at like 9ish
btw i thought of title for your book, the “what would molly maguire do” = If Only

because a lot of times she wishes she was smart, courageous and strong like molly was so she finds herself thinking if only she were like her and saying if only this didnt happen and stuff like that. She keeps thinking about the if's in life so.... If Only xo Alexandra

Monday, July 4, 2011

Bruce Tango from the Ghost Hunters show

Thu, 30 Sep 2010: Al, should we spend the money? (Ad in paper): It's time to hunt for ghosts. Starting Friday, Oct. 1, Bruce Tango from Syfy Channel's television show "Ghost Hunters" will be leading the hunt at the Proprietary House , 149 Kearny Ave. Tango will be at Proprietary House at 7:30 p.m. He will return for visits at 7:30 p.m. on the next three Fridays, Oct. 8, 15 and 22. During his appearance, Tango will conduct a meet-and -greet, show the "Ghost Hunters" episode filmed at the Proprietary House, talk about the haunted history of the Proprietary House, tell ghost tales and conduct an electronic voice phenomena test.

ummmm yesssssss what kind of question is that? u know i love that stuff and tango is my favorite person from that show! aaaaahhhh i love him!

Okay, we’ll go on one of the following Fridays. I just ordered your boots so we’re saving a little money by not buying them in the city. We’ll tell Dad we’re going to a haunted house, okay? I actually just called the Proprietary House and left a message. I’ll let you know what tour we will be scheduled on. Does Judy like that stuff or is she against ghosts? I am leaving here in a few minutes b/c I have a math test on campus…Mom

yay rain boots =] yesterday i was in class allll day long and then we had to clean the whole room and stuff for room inspections which we passed =]
today i only had one class... and we were discussing time management and stuff like that
so now im doing homework and then gonna nap and eat then i have zumba at 6 and at 9 i have a XYZ meeting and then a mixer but idk if I wanna go because i have nothing to wear for the theme so im probably just gonna go to the meeting and then go back to my dorm afterwards.

Hey, I got a 93 on my math test. Mom

Congrats on a 93! My math test is on the 8th. oh and i forgot tomorrow can u pick me up at night because theres a home football game tomorrow and i wanna be there its against Y University, it’s supposed to be good so ill let u know the times?

Even the rain boots have to be perfect, sigh

Tuesday, September 28, 2010: How is it going this week? Tomorrow I will try ordering your rain boots, if not, we’ll look in New York this weekend. Be good, Love Mom

im sitting here in english class writing about why binge drinking is bad at college....hahahaha ohhh the irony lol just kidding
i got a card from Aunt Liese i just checked the mail lol =] (Aunt Liese is from Germany)

Doesn’t that feel wonderful, to have a card or letter in the mailbox when you’re away from home? She is such a sweetie. I’ll call her and let her know how happy it made you. Mom


Do not wear your Ugg Boots tomorrow, even the spray might not be strong enough for that much rain. Wear flip flops and we’ll get you boots on the weekend.

Shootings and Prayers

Tuesday, September 28, 2010: Judy,
Did you drive Beth back to campus this morning or last night? What did you do with the rest of the weekend? They had a good time together, great that they stay in touch. 
Al argued with her father about history, she is learning stuff that he can’t keep up with, it’s funny to listen to. Our drop-off routine is pretty much the same every time: She watches a show on Sunday night at seven, then at eight either I, or Roy and I together, drive her back, help her carry stuff to her building, but do not go upstairs, b/c it’s such a hassle to sign us in, leave our drivers licenses, and remember to pick them up on the way out. So we just drop her off, sometimes we get a kiss, mostly not, only when the kid before us hugs his parents, then I can hug her, too. I always laugh because on Friday afternoon it’s like an exodus, everybody is leaving campus, and on Sunday night the opposite happens, the mommies and daddies are dropping their kids off with bags of groceries and laundry bags, bye-bye, see you Friday, just like an extended day care center.
I told her about the Seton Hall incident (shooting), but she knows everything and knows what she’s doing, so she just rolls her eyes, but I still preach to her every week. Later, Heather

LOL! Too funny - I love your analogy to an extended day care center! :-) 
Yup - the Seton Hall thing was really scary, and today there was a shooting at Texas U......what's going on with this world?   
The "partying" Alexandra and others do doesn't bother me that much, but the fact that the partying isn't on campus is a bit scary.....I mean....the parties are in downtown campus near other schools not so good areas......that you're in that environment with a bunch of strangers whose character you don't know - that's scary to me...I would be much more comfortable if everything took place ON campus for some reason - although that's probably just a false sense of security at best.......hopefully though, she's thinking with her head.....I of course will continue to pray for her......Judy